ForgottenDawn's audio Reviews on Newgrounds

[Stay in the Fall]

The grunge influences all over the place in this song, haha. This is brilliant, mate, professionally mastered and executed, even more so than your previous entry. The only thing I'd point out would be to either let the vocals feel less overdubbed or experiment with a vintage or lo-fi filter and add slight reverb to it. This song has a great structure and progression, and a very "Black Hole Sun" kind of mood. Great job
//FD

PS: As a side note, I might consider collaborating with you. ;)

motakay responds:

Thanks a ton! The dub thing was new to me and will I certainly treat it differently in the future. If I would work on it some more I would dub the "Chorus" parts one more time. They sound very paned as they are now.

Cool! Just let me know what you might have in mind and I would love to collaborate sometime. :)

[Paper Plane]

I would agree with Jay-Turner here, it's a real pity that you couldn't record this with real instruments and I'm definitely looking forward to hearing that version, if you'll ever do it in the future. There's quite a vivid collection of influences here, from Zappa to '70s prog rock, and it also reminds me of early The Mars Volta at some points. This song is quite psychedelic and while not exactly my cup of tea, it is still well programmed and executed and I think it reaches the nadir when you let your instruments breathe a little in the solo part.
Well done, mate
//FD

motakay responds:

Thank you!! :)

[Cosmic Stream of Life]

It's definitely an enjoyable piece with a good groove and plenty of "punch" packed in almost five minutes. While the progression isn't bad and it welcomes plenty of transitions that feel pretty smooth and flowing, the first noticeable thing is just how loud the mastering is. I suggest you to turn down your levels a bit in order to leave some breathing space for each instrument and ultimately some rest for your ears. The problem is not just volume but compression that leaves your mix almost brickwalled. It's good to have a fair degree of dynamics between the synths and not having them all over the place. Other than that, it's a fairly enjoyable tune and that quite fits the artwork of choice.
//FD

EctiBot responds:

Thx alot for the feedback :D. Really glad you enjoyed it :).
Thx for the tip about the mastering. This song is basically only the 3rd song where I've actually touched the mixer at all X3. Thus I'm still learning and it's really helpful when people comes with comments on it :D. Will try tweaking the levels around a bit :).
I'll also look into compression a bit more. Real novice when it comes to that X3.

Again thank you for the review. I'm glad that you think it fits the art and that you found it enjoyable :D.
-enochcity

[Merry-Go-Round]

It's quite an enjoyable piece, if rather repetitive and a bit too tight in dynamics. It has an interesting "oomph" throughout the whole track and while I wished it had a more dynamic progression, perhaps with more variations on the theme, I don't really have any particular complaint to point out speaking of structure. I like how the sound pans between the stereo channels, as it's a nice detail and it helps keeping the atmosphere a little more refreshing to listen to. I would work on making the sound less compressed and more immersive, by possibly introducing more background synths and leaving space for other themes to take place. It's a good effort nonetheless.
//FD

jawalker213 responds:

hmmm.. don't think you really know what you're talking about. That being said, I enjoyed hearing your opinion which help me focus on another aspect of production..

[~SW~ Fog Between]

Hm, well, it's definitely not a bad piece and I like how it transitions after the first minute, as I feel it's very expressive in its simplicity. I also recognized the piano you used that gives that particular "buzz" and I know it's the instrument itself generating that sound, so you couldn't have really controlled that. Nonetheless, I'm giving this a quick review because I know you've probably submitted something far more interesting than this for the contest, and while I don't consider this effort to be average, it's not spectacular either. I guess it was perhaps an act of liberation for you, pouring out the sadness and stress in one take and it's something I can relate to particularly, but that's pretty much it.
//FD

SkyeWint responds:

It was definitely more of an act of liberation than anything. I understand everything you've said in this, and I agree with it.

...also, I actually could have controlled a lot of the buzz. It's in one of the two layers of the instrument - it's just normally automatic.

[Shards]

It's an enjoyable slow piece with a good structure and an atmosphere that doesn't fail to live up to the artwork of choice.

Dynamics-wise, I like how the strings are mastered and they manage to be quite expressive, although the instruments introduced later on while essential for the build-up they sound a little cluttered and bright compared to the somber, somewhat tragic mood of the intro. I would have loved a little more work on the bass frequencies, perhaps adding basses would suffice as to "carry" the chords along and letting the whole string work feel more cohesive.

I'd argue that the intro is perhaps the highlight of this piece, as it sets the mood quite well and it sounds somewhat natural compared to the mechanical-sounding piano which could have been humanized a bit in terms of velocity and time, and I'm not judging the quality of the samples themselves, I'm judging their execution.

The ending feels a little abrupt and I would have personally preferred if you left the second-last chord suspended for a while, made a brief pause and then a closure with a minor chord focused on the "heavier", bass strings.

//FD

LunyAlex responds:

Thank you for the feedback. Dully noted.

[MrO- Emperor]

Sorry for the wait, there are a lot of entries this year. xD

Well it's definitely an improvement over your first submission. It's still quite repetitive even for "electro house" as you've mentioned earlier, and in terms of progression it doesn't offer much while you do have a structure you can improve upon.

I think your lead synth could have had more grit and distortion, also covering some bass frequencies as well. If you're a fan of electro house, something I generally don't find myself listening to as a personal taste, you may notice that the lead (rarely more than one) has a fuller sound, usually stretched between the stereo channels (panning also takes place to give it a hypnotic, psychedelic sound), with some reverb and vintage delay to give it a "stadium"-like ambiance and then distortion for an engaging texture of 90 nails scratching a blackboard on all four walls of your room, reminding me of the single "Satisfaction" if you're familiar with the tune.

Some vocoder or formant changed vocals could help as well, if a bit cliché, they could be glitched up and make it a little interesting to hear. I have nothing to say about the drums actually, as I feel they've been programmed well also in terms of mastering and EQ. Maybe some transition effects like risers and booms may help smoothing the different parts together and create a more flowing experience.

Keep working on making your progressions and synths fuller and more engaging to listen to, and I think you're probably in the right direction.
//FD

Mrobeymenow responds:

Thanks for the review! I really appreciate it. I'm glad you thought my drums were good, that's something you get little review on and is hard to know whether people like them. Also on you vocals comment I agree and in my current WIP I do have vocals in places to give some effects. Although I didn't agree with the sound of 90 nails on a blackboard, it was written in good enough detail it's kind of hard to get mad at. Thanks for the help!

[MechanicalRonin]

While I enjoyed the dark vibes you provided, I feel like this piece needs some more polish and examination. The drum work is still remarkable and it's probably the best part of the song, but I wish you offered something more than that, like more background synths and rhythmic/sequenced synths, because the atmosphere by itself isn't bad but I wish you'd developed it further.

The bass could have been more present in the mix and slightly more distorted since the general mood is supposed to be ominous and dark. What about more hints at traditional Japanese music, like a shakuhachi sample or woodblocks? The shamisen you used kinda reminds me of Photek but it honestly gets quite repetitive after a while if it weren't for the ever-evolving drums.

Overall, it's still an enjoyable piece, if quite straight to the point and somewhat fitting of your art choice.
//FD

YouriX responds:

Yeah i geuss i spent a tad more time on my drums hahaha! xD
I guess was way to much in to my drums that i centerd the song around it. I shuld have added more layers and sounds. But just like you i liked the song for what it is. :D

[Spirit Realm]

I don't think this piece is terrible and in fact it does have a good structure and a somewhat melodic base, while the atmosphere's a bit lacking. I think the piano could have needed more reverb in order to bring out a spacey, chill atmosphere because right now it feels rather dry and in terms of expression, and it honestly doesn't really offer much at the end of the day.

The wobbling bass while it's exactly not the best in the field does its job decently, although I would have loved some more variations and perhaps more grit and distortion to bring it more character and presence in the mix. The mastering is performed well with only very minor issues relative to limiting/compression, but it's somewhat tolerable.

Now the synths that play the various chords could have been in my opinion brighter and less prominent in the mix, in order to leave some breathing space for more background instruments like a sidechained pad and rhythmic/sequenced synths. I have nothing really to point out about the drums, there's a good "punch" and even the snare that could feel week at a first glance, at the current state of things can fit well. Maybe the hats could have had more of a presence since the high end feels kind of empty, along with the crash cymbal, but they're otherwise well programmed.

//FD

Jayk-O responds:

Thank you!! I've actually learned how to better my song after this.
I'll keep these concepts in mind :)

[After Us (updated)]

That's some sexy distortion going on there, a pretty vast improvement over the previous version of this track. I only wish some of the orchestra were more glitched/crushed and less flat-sounding, perhaps some vibrato would have helped. I know it's really the samples themselves, but you can manually do that with an LFO at very fast intervals. I like the stereo panning you applied and even though there's not much low end, it still is quite the enjoyable post-apocalyptic piece.
Well done
//FD

Thonz responds:

Thank you for the review and the advice. In my future pieces I'll definitely try out what you suggested.